Child Safety

As a parent I always felt like keeping our children safe was one of my main jobs.  When they were little I would make sure nothing dangerous was in their reach.  As they got older I would teach them to look both ways before crossing the street, don't talk to strangers and was often heard telling them "Be careful!!".  After our sons were grown I realized I missed a major part of keeping them safe.  I did not teach them about child predators.  Fortunately nothing 'bad' happened to our sons when they were growning up.  When I started teaching Tiny Tigers (a preschool tae kwo do class) I did a lot of research on the subject and it really opened my eyes.  I am going to share some of what I learned.

First of all trust your instincts.  My Aunt Judy told me that.  Gavin DeBecker who is an expert in predicting when violence will occur (the psychology of it) agrees with my Aunt Judy.  My Aunt Judy told me that there was a youth Pastor at her brother-in-laws church that all of the kids liked, but my Aunt Judy did not like him.  He wanted her son to go on an overnight trip with some of the other youth and my Aunt Judy said no.  Later it was discovered that he was sexually abusing some of the boys.  Aunt Judy trusted her instincts and you need to trust your instincts too.

The second thing and just as important is summed up in three words; communication, communication and communication.  You need to be able to talk to your children and they should be able to talk to you about anything.  Listen to what they say and ask questions in a non provoking or panicky way.  If a child is being sexually abused they usually feel bad or guilty and the person who sexually abused the child usually threatens them or scares them in some way.  You need to be open and honest when your children ask questions about their bodies, your body or about where babies come from (how detailed depends on the age and the situation).

Listening to your child's fears is very important.  Why don't they like to go to Uncle Harry's house??  Why will they hug everyone except your neighbor.  If your child does not want to hug or kiss someone do not force them; give them the right to say no.  If your child does not want to hug or kiss grandma and grandpa teach them to say no, but still have manners. 

One of my Tiny Tiger's instructors daughter went to a friends house overnight.  She was about 8 years old.  The brother of the little girl she spent the night with made her lift up her shirt.  When the daughter got home she was talking to her mom and her mom was listening to her and she heard what her daughter said..  The mom asked more questions (not in a panicky way) and then she called the parents of the boy.  The parents did nothing, but the little girl was allowed to come over to the daughters house, but she was not allowed to go to the little girls house.  Listening is very important.

This is going to be more than one blog because there is too much information to share for just one blog.  Those 3 things are a good start; listen to your instincts, communication and listening to your child.  They all sound very basic, but they are extremely important in your child's safety.

Proverbs 28:4  Those who forsake the law praise the wicked, but those who keep the law resist them.