I was listening to Chuck Swindoll today. He was talking about sex and what a gift it is in marriage. Sex is designed by God and to be enjoyed by married people. It goes beyond just the physical and practical it goes to the emotional and spiritual.
Today's society says that sex is just the physical and is a natural need. You deserve to have sex and if you are not married, but are committed then it is fine. You can try each other out and see if you are compatable. If you use a condom you will be safe from diseases, unwanted pregnancy and if it doesn't work out you will be fine. Not true!!
Today's Christian society is not much different. Many Christians say 'God loves us and we accepted Christ so we are forgiven' or 'God knows I have this need and I am sure he understands'. There is the 'we are going to get married anyway, so why wait?' reasoning that often comes in after a young couple has been dating for a long time and they may even be engaged.
The truth is premaritial sex is not God's design and there is a reason for it. Some of the consequences of premaritial sex are: sexually transmitted diseases, unwanted pregnancy and relationship troubles.
Sexually transmitted diseases are just plain nasty. Some of them never go away. If you get an std from one person and then break up with him or her and marry someone else, the person you marry is going to have to deal with that disease also. Some of them can cause problems with pregnancies or can even make you infertile.
If you get pregnant before you are married it affects your marriage. Women often wonder if their husband really loves them or if they married them because they got pregnant. It is a thought that never goes away. The husband will often feel guilty about the pregnancy or feel betrayed and deceived.
Chuck Swindoll said one thing he noticed about marriages where there was premaritial sex is that the husband always becomes passive. He said he has yet to see a marriage where this does not happen when there is premaritial sex.
His comments made me think about the butterfly. When a butterfly is coming out of its cocoon it has to struggle to get out. It is a long hard process. It is hard, but it has a purpose. The struggle that the butterfly has in the cocoon has more of a purpose than just getting the butterfly out. While the butterfly is struggling it is actually pushing fluid to its wings so that they will be strong. If the butterfly does not have that struggle it will not get the fluid to its wings properly and it will be weak and possibly die.
Consider the dating and engagement period a time of necessary struggle against some of those temptations. If you wait and do it God's way the fluid will go to your wings and it is a good strong start to your marriage.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.
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